I recently had a fraught email exchange with a friend. Most of the conflict came from me forgetting that we hadn't spoken much in four years and in that time I have changed so much. I have moved from being an academic to a homeschool mom. Settled into my new position, I'm baffled when someone... Continue Reading →
I've been trying to make my way out of the swamp of white privilege for 20 years. I've definitely taken some wrong turns. I've made more progress since quitting academia and beginning to unschool full time. I'm learning how to listen. So despite all these wrong turns, now I think working toward being an anti-racist white person is pretty simple. This is what I've come to: listen, speak, act.
One of my favorite bloggers is someone who frequently cusses about mothering. This doesn't fit in with the tone of most unschooling blogs I read, about finding peace and meditating to deal with triggers and finding joy everyday with your kids. I love those things. But I also think cussing--and writing--about mothering is a lifesaver.... Continue Reading →
I often get the suggestion that I should make my daughter do something she's afraid of so that she'll be prepared, to fix something about her, so that she can succeed in the future. Ironically, these suggestions put her fears up against grownup's worry-fears about the future. Fear versus fear. I think with a neurotypical... Continue Reading →
I let my kids stomp and squish and splash in the mud, and I'm not proud. This post is not about how this makes me a better parent. It most certainly isn't about how kids need to get out there and interact with the "real" world rather than sitting on screens. It's not even about... Continue Reading →
What I'm feeling could be described as just post-vacation blues. Or I could write a novel about family histories, poverty, capitalism, abuse, misogyny, white supremacy. Or I could tell the story of my kids and their small joys, challenges, victories, discoveries. Or the romance of my husband and I, moving between cities and states, searching... Continue Reading →
Why do we think that every time someone asks for help they are exploiting or manipulating us as individuals? Until people just give up asking and either wane away or start cutting themselves or hitting their classmates or burning down buildings.
Yesterday I had several people decide to tell me to spend less time with my kids, squash out meltdowns by ignoring them and refusing to be manipulated, and cut out tv and video games. Today I'm not answering the phone. Today we ran races in the front yard and were awarded handmade trophies. We learned... Continue Reading →
Unschooling has been a process of uncovering layers and layers of myself. As is parenthood, but unschooling pushes us deeper, we are with ourselves and our reflections--our children, our motivations, our triggers--all. the. time. And no wonder there are so many cover ups and walls and shields in myself. I cannot imagine what my daughter... Continue Reading →